Walking Hand in Hand

This morning, like many mornings, I was awake during 4th Watch. I laid in bed for a while, then got up, made a coffee and curled up in a chair with a blanket to pray. I was full of thoughts for those with whom I share my life, and all the things that are bubbling around in their lives, causing pain and grief and sadness. So I gave those things up to Jesus. Messy marriages. Cancer, addiction, suicidal ideations, diabetes, poverty, lust. The junk that rears its ugly head in our lives; the junk that can overtake us if we let it; the junk we better give to Jesus before it gets the better of us. Then I proceeded to share with Him the things plaguing me--my junk.

Folks say that the Lord will use you where He has healed you--I read that in books by Jesus people, and in little squares of notions that well-meaning people post on the interwebs. It may or may not be Biblical, but it has a ring to it. And so I was thinking: He has healed me from a great many things. Unforgiveness. Addiction. Emotional trauma from a crazy childhood. Pain and sickness in my physical body and in my mind. I have been genuinely delivered from so much, healed and transformed.

But I still struggle with things in my humanity that I know will not bear fruit spiritually, and might well hurt me or others in a time. I asked the LORD to take those things from me, and if necessary, to "burn it out". I have been crying out to Him to "burn it out" for years now. What does that even mean? Burn it out??

Fire.

Holy Fire. (The entire Book of Leviticus. Isaiah 10.)

Cleansing. (Malachi 3.)

Purification. (Malachi 3.)

Refining. (Zechariah 13. Malachi 3. Revelation 3.)

Fire consumes Sacrifices that we place on the Altar before Him. (1 Kings 18, 2 Chron 7.)

Fire is quick.

Fire is a symbol of Holy Spirit. (Acts 2. 1 Thess 5.)

In the Bible, He is called "a Wall of Fire around us and the Glory in our midst".( Zechariah 2.)

He led the Israelites in the wilderness by a Pillar of Fire by night. (Exodus.)

His glory. (Exodus 24. Deuteronomy 5. 2 Chronicles 7.)

Light.

Warmth.

Destruction.

Total destruction.

So when I pray for my God and my King to "burn it out", it is a big ask. And I have to be willing to endure whatever that means, so long as it purifies, cleanses, and refines me. He is coming, y'all. He is coming for His Bride. And she has to be Holy, and Pure--without spot or blemish or any such thing (Ephesians 5:27). His Bride is The Church, that's what the Bible says. But His Bride is me as well. I have to be ready for Him when He comes!

So as I prayed, He brought to my remembrance--a vision of what His safety looks like to me. A few months ago, I was in a time of sacred prayer, and asked Jesus what He wants me to know about what His safety looks like to me. And as quickly as I could journal the question, a picture, perfectly clear like a photograph, came to my mind. It was me, walking toward eternity, a long road with no end in sight, on a very narrow path. Jesus was with me, we were holding hands. And the path was lined on all sides in fire. My silver hair was flying up, all around, blown by the wind that the fire was creating. And it was just Jesus and me. The flames were about waist-high, but I was not on fire, only in the fire. And as I prayed this morning, I realized more fully than ever--a revelation you might say--that I am only safe when I am holding hands with Him. I am only safe when I give Him everything. I am only safe when I trust Him enough to say "burn it out" and then take His hand and walk through it with Him.

He is my warmth. He is my Light. He is the destruction of my sin, of my "self". He is the all-consuming fire that burns up the sacrifices that I place on the Altar. He is the Glory in my midst. He refines and purifies me in body and spirit. He is the Holy Spirit who leads and guides me in all Truth. He is my only Safety, my only Security.

It's amazing what Jesus will reveal to you during 4th Watch. As the days roll by, and I spend more and more of the early hours alone with Him, I see where He is taking me. He only shows me a tiny bit at a time. But He is using me, even now, to share with others the True Light, the True Fire, the Only Fire. I am amazed and in awe of His Love for me. That He would share with me these secrets of the Spirit and revelations of His personal Glory.

I have shared it before, but it bears repeating: I am not a Preacher. But there is power in our testimony. It gives God glory when we share with others the things He is doing in our lives. He loves it when we speak of Him, when we share His Love and glory with one another. One of my favorites is Malachi 3:16...it goes like this: "Then those who feared the LORD talked with each other, and the LORD listened and heard. A scroll of remembrance was written in His presence concerning those who feared the LORD and honored His name". He knows when we are talking about Him, He listens and hears. Woooooo! That is powerful! I hope I never forget that!

Earlier, I was musing that He will use you where He has healed you; aka use me where He has healed me. And as each day passes, He burns out more, refines and purifies and cleanses, I see more clearly than ever so many things He has delivered me from (pardon the preposition). Alcoholism, PTSD, childhood trauma, simmering rage that underlies those things, impurities of body, mind and spirit, physical illness and pain. The list is long, and I am so grateful. And now He can use me, to help others, to help you. I am equipped to pray for anything that ails God's people; He has sent me to do that!! I am not a counselor, and never will be. But I know The Counselor. And I will be happy to make an introduction, pray for you, pray with you, teach you to pray, stand in the gap if you can't pray or won't pray, or don't know where to begin.

I would love to hold your hand in prayer. And whatever it is that you have going on, we will take it to Him. When we get quiet, settle down, worship, soak in the Word and then pray, then you will be prepared to hear from Him directly. Godly counsel is great; but Jesus is the Best!

He called me to Pray for You.

Grace and Peace!

Leslie~